Channel Surfing

HEY GOOFBALLS

2007-12-06T17:00:00.000-08:00

New URL!

http://channelsurfing.freedomblogging.com/

Whoohoo! Follow RVJ to the new site!

Motion to strike

2007-11-15T19:07:00.000-08:00

OK, so those guys are on strike (photography by Albert Ching, by the way).

But guess who's back! That's right! Me! To celebrate the occasion, here's a clip of Angel returning in season three of "Buffy."

Talk balk

2007-10-03T23:38:00.000-07:00

In under a week, we've had two famously awkward talk show confrontations - Paris Hilton on "The Late Show with David Letterman" Friday and "Hardball" host Chris Matthews on "The Daily Show" Tuesday. Like 99% of America, I thought the Paris Hilton interview was pretty funny - I mean, really, who was expecting probing (no pun intended) questions about her perfume? But the "TDS" bit was a little harder to take for me. It seemed more like Jon Stewart was taking issue with Darrell Hammond's Chris Matthews impression than the actual guy himself, who seems like a pretty cool dude. Sure, "Life's A Campaign" sounds like a pretty dumb book, but Stewart never explained - or gave Matthews a chance to explain - beyond what's in the title. It'd be like having the author of the "The Neverending Story" on and complaining about the fact that it did, indeed, end. I've preferred "The Colbert Report" to "TDS" for a while now, and this further illustrates why - in having Matthews on for seemingly no reason to take him to task and not give him much of a chance to respond, he sort of becomes what he satires.

So, much like celebrity deaths, it stands to reason that awkward talk show encounters come in threes. So what's next? Looking at upcoming lineups, I'm gonna guess Josh Duhamel on "The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson" on Friday. That is just an explosive controversy waiting to happen.

In case you missed them (the "TDS" one will probably be yanked by Viacom sooner rather than later):

Comedy can be funny

2007-10-03T21:20:00.000-07:00

Comedy Central has made some head-scratching moves lately, like renewing "Li'l Bush" - I can see renewing "Mind of Mencia," which they also did, because I guess there's people out there that like it - but "Li'l Bush"? Is there really another season worth of material out there? Isn't he going to be out of office soon? Wasn't this show a better idea like, seven years ago, when they did have a Bush-themed show that was pretty funny? They also canceled "The Showbiz Show," which I don't really care about and wouldn't have been such a big deal if not compounded with this other news (I would take a million "Showbiz Show"s over one frame of "MoM"). I also fear that the "Michael Ian Black Doesn't Understand" project might be DOA; I haven't heard anything about it in months.

But, Wednesday nights, it's all good, because tonight "South Park" and "The Sarah Silverman Program" are back with new episodes (props to CC for not putting new South Parks with the execrable fellow animated series "Drawn Together"). I've seen a lot of Sarah Silverman the past 24 hours, on Letterman last night, "The View" this morning (I watched it only because I knew she'd be on - honest!) and I even heard her sniffing Richard Christy's balls on Howard Stern today. Hopefully I won't be too sick of her saying naughty things while talking in a little girl voice by the time her show comes on.

'Dancing with the Stars' - guy with awesome first name gets eliminated

2007-10-03T21:12:00.001-07:00

I'm playing catch up here, but yes, Albert Reed, whoever that is, was eliminated last night on "Dancing with the Stars" - not a huge loss all things considered (other than my prediction being wrong, a rare occurrence indeed). The real tragedy is saying bye to Anna Trebunskaya, his awesome professional partner. Fellow "DwtS" historians remember that she was Jerry Rice's spunky, fiery, redheaded, Eastern European partner in season two. She missed the last couple of seasons, so it was great to have her back, albeit fleetingly.

'House' 4.2 - Scottsdale brat

2007-10-03T19:32:00.000-07:00

What a huge bummer to find out that Cameron and Chase hadn't really moved to Scottsdale (480 shoutout what what), it was just a playful gambit on the part of one James Wilson. I was all excited to call them up, maybe take in dinner at Cowboy Ciao or hit Martini Ranch, then grab some late night grub at Mickey's Hangover. Pity.

This was a really super great episode, with plenty of comic relief from the team of wannabes (referring to them exclusively by number sorta reminded me of "Gossip Girl" characters calling each other "S" and "B"). A black Mormon, wha? It stretches believability somewhat that a dude with no medical degree could get that far in the interview process, but I guess House was serious about not reading resumes.

Looks like Kal Penn is going to be a series regular - I knew he had that bold, experimental style that House was looking for! Good for him, I mean, between this and the will hotly anticipated "Harold & Kumar 2," we're in a new era of Penntasticness. But it also sounds pretty awkward, given that it doesn't exactly take a world-renowned diagnostician to see that Chase, Cameron and Foreman will be back on staff soon.

Primitive notion

2007-10-02T19:00:00.000-07:00

It's here! On TV, right now! "Cavemen," the show that is so bad they won't let critics see it, the show with the worse buzz since "Baby Bob." Maybe a little worse, actually. Let's see how long I can last with it - personally, I'm surprised that it wasn't canceled before the west coast airing.

7:03 p.m. - Wow, this is a very ugly show. Both the way it's shot and the makeup of the characters.

7:04 p.m. - OMG, Nick Swardson! I like him! Not that his presence indicates quality. He was in "The Benchwarmers."

7:07 p.m. - So, what's the plot of this show, exactly? That this show takes place in some sort of alternate universe where somehow there are cavemen that have survived today but are otherwise in every way like anyone else except for having crappy makeup applied to their faces? And other than that, the world is exactly the same? That's the kind of thing that's not important in a 30-second commercial, but on a series, will start to seem even stupider than it obviously is. So is Swardson a regular character on this show or what?

7:10 p.m. - "Carpoolers" (which I didn't realize until right now stars the patriarch from "Sons and Daughters") looks like it won't be much better; at least this has some sort of a (lame) hook. I probably won't find out. I probably won't find out what the next 20 minutes of this is like, either.

7:27 p.m. - I turned it back on and caught the end. It's not like this show is SO bad - though it is quite bad - but it's more, like, what the heck is the point? The best jokes are just ones about three dudes, and at that point the caveman gimmick seems wholly unnecessary. But since it is such an obnoxious and intrusive element, it's not like you could get past that - and for all the times the cavemen aspect is played up, there's hardly even any creepy, vaguely racist overtones people were crowing about. No buys.

The doctor is inane

2007-10-02T02:25:00.000-07:00

By some terrible stroke of luck, I ended up seeing the first three minutes of the initial"Dr. Steve-O" episode Monday night - and, just in that short time, it officially beat out Fuse's "Rad Girls" as the most loathsome show I've seen on "actual" TV in quite a while. And keep in mind that "Rad Girls" is mainly just women in bikinis vomiting.

The show opens with a jaunty musical number explaining the premise of the show (because apparently it's fairly complex). Basically, "Jackass" vet "Dr." Steve-O helps "wussies" (and yes, that's the word they use. because, you know, people actually say that) become, well, less wussy. To make things even worse, it's giving Trishelle work.

'Dancing with the Stars' - Wayne whorled

2007-10-02T02:06:00.000-07:00

Wayne Newton getting the lowest score yet (15) on season five of "Dancing with the Stars" is, of course not surprising. What also should not be surprising is him staying past Tuesday's elimination show - the Jerry Springer/Cliff Clavin rule of sympathetic old men states very clearly that he's got at least a couple more weeks of life left in him.

So who gets the boot? I'm not quite as sure as I was last week with Josie Maran, but let's look at the stats. With so many of the guys doing so much worse than the women, and so many of the guys being complete unknowns, I gotta go with one of the - Albert Reed, Cameron Mathison and Floyd Mayweather all notched 21s, but they're handsome men (crucial for the "DwtS" demographic), so I can't see any of them going out second week. Although given his obvious name value, I don't feel great about it, but I'll have to go with Mark Cuban - sure, he's famous, but much like season 3 first exit Tucker Carlson, more people will want to see him fail than actually vote for him, plus he got the second-to-lowest score (18). It'll be a shame be cause that means no more Kym Johnson. Another reason to hate Mark Cuban.

Sad to see Jennie Garth biff that move at the end there, I guess she was in tears afterwards. Wah!

Digital divide

2007-10-02T01:55:00.000-07:00

So, all the buzz from the 114th "SNL" season premiere was about the Kanye West sketch, which indeed was hilarious, but this was the highlight for me - the 1-second Jake Gyllenhaal cameo merely being the icing on an uproarious cake. Of note: This sketch was posted on YouTube by NBC themselves this weekend, but was taken down by the network - weird, perhaps there's some sort of "Dear Sister"-esque controversy behind it I'm not aware of.

I thought there was actually plenty of funny stuff in this episode - Will Forte saying "The Black ET" repeatedly, the sketch where Bill Hader says "JEFF!" and "I get it" to Jason Sudeikis, the return of Penelope, the mildly funny HSM3 sketch - could be worse. I really like Samberg, Hader and Sudeikis, and hope they continue to, you know, be funny (and be in quality summer movies).

UPDATE: Yes, there is some sort of controversy, involving an uncleared Aphex Twin sample used in the sketch. Bummer.

Script doctors

2007-10-01T01:47:00.000-07:00

Albert: I can't wait for a Penelope movie
Albert: she could interact with other movie characters
Justin: I have 102 dalmations. so
Albert: she'd be like, Luke Skywalker, I blew up fifty Death Stars this morning, so
Albert: no one can refuse any of my offers ever, so
Justin: ~~~~~~~~~
Albert: let's write the script
Albert: Wiig can play multiple characters a la Norbit
Albert: Penelope can go to Target
Justin: whoa ho
Albert: and run into the two a-holes
Albert: and the Joe Schmo household
Justin: you look like a rabbit
Albert: so you're in right
Albert: for writing this script
Justin: absolutely
Justin: let me bring up a famous movie quotes page and get cracking
Albert: it'd be the Ali G Indahouse of Kristen Wiig
Justin: "I invented walkin' here, so"
Justin: "my name is also James Bond, James Bond the first, so"
Justin: "I can't be back because I never left, so"
Justin: "my mama also always said that life is like a box of chocolates, and she made me boxes of chocolates and she made the chocolate and the boxes, so"
Justin: "they were actually talkin' to me, people are always, talkin'. to me. just something they like to do. be talkin' to me. so"
Albert: yessss
Albert: "I actually give a damn even less than you, so"
Justin: "I phoned my home too, so. just phoned them up, so. and I'm also an alien, so."
Albert: "my home's a little bit nicer than yours, so, you know, just a little bit better, so"
Albert: "I'm mad, too, and also not going to take it anymore, so, in fact, I decided that a little earlier than you, so, I was mad first, so"
Justin: "and I get unlimited minutes, so. my phone calls to other planets are free, so. it's a really good deal, just the best possible deal for phone calls, so"
Albert: "I'm not even mad, more like furious, so, you know, I'm the maddest person ever, in history, so"
Justin: "Mrs Robinson was actually trying to seduce me, so. people are always trying to seduce me, just something that's always happening, to me. so."
Albert: "I ate his liver, too, I've eaten everyone's livers, actually, everyone in history, so, there aren't any more livers left, because I ate them all"
Justin: I love the smell of napalm at any time of day, so. I have napalm-scented candles in my house that I light, so. and I'm made of napalm
Albert: "I've also always depended on the kindness of strangers, I invented the concept of strangers, yeah, before me, everyone knew each other, so, you know, pretty important"
Justin: I could've been even more of a contender, so. I was ranked #1 on the list of the top 100000 contenders in the world, so.
Albert: I actually raided this arc a long time before you, so, it's not lost any more, so, you know, actually I raided all the arcs, in the world, and some imaginary ones, too, so
Justin: people in space can hear me scream, so. because I invented a machine that lets people in space hear you, so. when I scream in space people can hear me, so. just, helpful, and convenient.
Albert: I actually can handle the truth, I won a contest, for best truth handler, in the world, ever, so, you know, pretty good at handling the truth
Justin: I built it and they already came, so. already did .. that, just something I decided to do, before now, so.
Albert: every time a bell rings, I get wings, too, so, not just angels, it's me too, I've got like, trillions of wings. so
Justin: I cooked what she's having, so. and I invented the recipe for it, so. and I own this whole restaurant, and everything on the menu makes people act like they're having an orgasm, so.
Justin: I'm the actual king of the world, so. won the election, for it. everyone voted for me for king of the world, so. just something I won, which is nice.
Albert: I have my own island, full of dinosaurs, it's in my bedroom, so, you know, a little more dinosaurs than here, different species, and you know, it's a little safer than this place, people really like it
Justin: Soylent Green is me, so
Justin: I'm the actual luckiest man on the face of the earth, so. just have the most, luck, which is nice, so.
Albert: I actually already showed him the money, so, you know, no need for you to do that, it's taken care of
Albert: you don't need a bigger boat, really, I'm a boat, the biggest boat ever built, so
Justin: OMG I was just working on one for having the biggest boat in the world so

'The Office' 4.1 - Rabid fanbase

2007-09-28T10:17:00.000-07:00

Hey, Jim and Pam are together! That should make the "JAM" "'shippers" happy. Though now, thanks to the wisdom of Kevin Malone, we've got a much better Pam and Jim portmanteau - PB&J.

Compared to previous "Office" season premieres, "The Dundies" and "Gay Witch Hunt," this was pretty weaksauce. Now, I thought it was very, very, good, but it just felt a little too silly and over the top at times, I guess - a giant check made out to "science" is funny, sure, but a little out of tone for The Office. Same with Andy taping up his nipples (I am one of the biggest Andy fans around, but that was not his shining moment). That compounded with Pam walking in on naked Michael and yet another motivational speech from Pam to Michael, it all just started to feel a little tiresome.

It's weird - I liked all the supersized and hourlongs in the past, and I always heard people say that they were too long or dragged or whatever. I was like "no way! More of something I like!" But last night I felt they might have a point.

Obviously there were plenty of great moments - all the Dwangela stuff, anything Kevin did, the clever references to the camera, some great wordplay like "a little stitious" and the Jeopardy thing - but it felt, to me, liked it lacked a certain something that makes The Office not just extremely funny, but also one of the best shows on TV.

There has to be something more to Jim and Pam, too. I'm completely confident that the writers wouldn't finally get them together just to have them act exactly like they did in season one and two, other than occasionally being caught holding hands. Unless that's the idea, I guess.

It's relative subparness was compounded by airing on the same night as an exception "My Name Is Earl" series premiere ("If you ask me, the Civil War never ended, we're just at halftime) and two awesome "IASIP"s (Judy Greer is the queen of clever sitcom cameos).

Share of devils in this angel town

2007-09-27T16:44:00.000-07:00

Officially psyched. Haha, "implants." I get it!

Darkly Shopping Dexter

2007-09-27T15:14:00.000-07:00

There's a red-dyed fountain outside of the Barnes and Noble at Desert Ridge Marketplace right now, to promote the second season of "Dexter" (which starts Sunday), in some novel viral marketing. Some jerk wrote about it here. If I had time, I'd totally make the 35-40 minute drive out there to take a picture of it, and post it here, but I don't, so I won't. Sad, I know.

Ratings: Addiset back

2007-09-27T14:46:00.000-07:00

Why are you so smiley, Kate Walsh? Sure, you're starring in a new TV show and went to the same high school as my mom, but "Private Practice" kind of, you know, bombed in the ratings last night, getting beat by "Bionic Woman." "BW" got a 5.5 in 18-49s, with "PP" only netting a 5.1. "BW" has actually popped the highest rating for a new series so far all fall (and for some reason I don't see, say, "Carpoolers," giving it a run for its money), and on viewership-starved NBC probably means that it's practically already been renewed. Obviously, the second week is the "real test" for both these shows. Neither show is lighting the critical world on fire, though; I was lukewarm to "BW," and the 10 minutes or so I saw (mainly by accident) of "PP" was plenty. Also apparently atrocious: "Big Shots," debuting tonight.

'Bionic Woman' 1.1 - Dismemberment plan

2007-09-27T01:19:00.000-07:00

"Bionic Woman" was probably my most anticipated fall show this year, for one pretty good reason - it's produced by David Eick, who, along with Ronald Moore, is responsible for the totally rad "Battlestar Galactica" remake. Of course, "Bionic Woman" follows the same rough formula - it's a super-serious reimagining of a cheesy '70s sci-fi show, where the basic concepts and some character names are kept and everything else is built from the ground up. The fact that Mae Whitman, aka Annie McNoFace, was cast to play the title character's deaf younger sister, was just a bonus (though she got recasted and the character regained her hearing somewhere along the way).

Other than behind-the-scenes stuff, the similarities to "BSG" are rather readily apparent - Katee "Kara 'Starbuck' Thrace" Sackhoff in a prominent role as the evil bionic woman, what looked to be the same font in the opening credits, and hey, even the Chief for a scene.

It's probably unfair to endlessly compare "BW" to "BSG," but let's do it for a while anyway. "BW" doesn't seem nearly as capable as working on the different levels "BSG" operates on - what with the political intrigue and real world parallels and all that. That doesn't mean "BW" doesn't have potential as a sci-fi/action series, but being a good sci-fi/action series isn't really what most people like about "BSG." At this point, "Bionic Woman" seems a lot tidier and in more of a typical good vs. evil continuum, and thus a lot less interesting (although that obviously could change). Does this mean that "BW" is a poor man's "BSG"? Mmmmaybe.

Michelle Ryan is an appealing enogh lead, like a younger, vaguely British Amanda Peet. What's jarring is how quickly she seems to go from being freaked out over the whole being a bionic woman thing to saying "Alright, cool," as is indicated in next week's previews. It's also weird and also fantastic to see Sackhoff in a considerably less butchy role than "BSG" (her makeup in the bar scene towards the end was somewhat disorienting). She's great and deserves a shot on a "real" network - speaking of which, it's odd to see a show like this on an NBC. It's more of a "real" sci-fi show, not a splashy, flashy affair like "Heroes." Nerds are taking over, just like Nostradamus predicted.

I'll stick around for episode two, but to again compare it to "BSG," you have to wonder if the hard science fiction aspects of it might not appeal to the masses. At least on "Battlestar," you've got people flying around in space to begin with, so you expect a certain amount of wackiness. Here, it's "Normal, normal, normal - hey, you have robot limbs and these crazy things crawling around your blood!" - normal, normal, normal." Could give a few cases of genre whiplash.

Hoff to a good start

2007-09-27T01:10:00.000-07:00

It's a good time to be David Hasselhoff. Whoa, that doesn't get said a lot. By anyone. Ever. But let's look at the facts. He's a celebrity judge on a moderately popular network summer reality show, and soon to be the star of his own "Curb Your Enthusiasm"-type program, according to this report from Variety. Will David Chokachi be his Richard Lewis?

But wait! That's not all! Variety is also reporting that NBC is looking to reimagine "Knight Rider," "Bionic Woman"/"Battlestar Galactica"-style. Though no Hoff involvement has been announced, it's hard to envision such a project without him.

Speaking of "Curb," it's been really hilarious this season.

'Dancing with the Stars' - Maran out of town

2007-09-26T22:57:00.000-07:00

My absolutely unparalleled "Dancing with the Stars" prediction rate remains as accurate as ever - Josie Maran was indeed the first person out on tonight's elimination show. She joins an illustrious group - Paulina Porizkova, Tucker Carlson, Kenny Mayne and original "Bacheorette" Trista Rehn Sutter. Heroes, all. Well, Josie, at least you're not a quitter like that Jimmy from "Kid Nation."

'House' 4.1 - Not accustomed to your face

2007-09-26T02:05:00.000-07:00

The first "House" without Foreman, Cameron and Chase - definitely didn't have any of those people in it.

That's surprising. I thought they'd be back by the first episode of this season (maybe not at their old jobs, but at least on the show), but, nope (teasers for next episode show they'll at least be there in ghosty hallunication form, though).

Pretty much, the episode was exactly what it sounds like - an episode of "House," but without most of the supporting cast. The illness o' the week had a good twist, and we got to see hilarious scheming Wilson. But a lot of people were probably hoping to find out more about what the old team is up to, but it looks like we'll have to wait at least a couple weeks for that, since we've got madcap House interviewing job candidates to look forward to next eppy. Which actually does sound fairly great.

Wain over me

2007-09-26T01:54:00.000-07:00

Despite it being premiere week, my favorite show right now isn't on that outdated, 20th century contraption, "television," it's online. It's "Wainy Days," a webshow starring David Wain of "The State" and "Stella" fame. Between this and the transcendent "Clark and Michael," it's really great that webshows are now being produced by people that I already like in "real" entertainment instead of just, you know, random nobodies.

And, like "C&M," each episode has been chockablock full of other people I like. So far on "Wainy Days," we've gotten the lovely Elizabeth Banks, the irrepressible A.D. Miles, the inimitable Michael Ian Black, the cagey Ken Marino, the crafty Kerri Kenney, and Callie Thorne, thankfully much less crazy and hard to take than she is on "Rescue Me." The latest episode ensured its place as "Clark and Michael" spiritual successor by featuring "Superbad" star Jonah Hill - plus there was some hot Thomas Lennon action, and it was great to see him playing someone other than Lt. Jim Dangle.

So yeah, watch it. In fact, the first episode is RIGHT HERE! You have no excuse!

Other news

2007-09-26T01:43:00.000-07:00

- Adrianne Curry's blog is apparently awesome. Who would guess such a thing? It's made the rounds this week, due to the original "Top Model" winner's declaration that though slavery "does suck some major balls," it's "time to move the fuck on." Bold. And, you know. Disturbing.

- You gotta dig all these specific references to time in this TMZ-Kiefer Sutherland-DUI story. Picture them being preceded by a digital clock and dramatic countdown sounds.

- "Nashville" has been canceled. I was not aware that it had started. The symmetry of it being replaced by "K-Ville" is not unnoticed, though.

- "HIMYM" was very funny Monday night, but I think we can consider any future "lower-back tatoo on slutty girls" jokes, starting with "Wedding Crashers" and ending with that episode, yes, wait, for it...

- I still haven't watched "Chuck," "Heroes" or "Reaper." I fail at life. However, Channel Surfing correspondent Justin Shapiro has weighed in with these insightful words on the "Heroes" season premiere: "That little girl is sassy. I would probably sass the shit out of people if I had Mohinder and fatty as My Two Dads."

'Dancing with the Stars' - Hélio: (not) phoned in

2007-09-25T23:23:00.001-07:00

Julianne Hough, who, aside from being adorable, won last year's "DwtS" alongside Apolo Anton Ohno, got the highest score tonight - with her and her partner, some guy I've never heard of (Hélio Castroneves, apparently a race car driver of some kind), leaping in front of the other dudes I've never heard of with a 25 (one point short of Sabrina Bryan's 26 Monday night).

Poor Josie Maran is still the worst, although, unsurprisingly, Floyd Mayweather and Wayne Newton also did pretty poorly (18 and 19, respectively). Maran is still the easy pick for first elimination Wednesday night. As a Phoenix Suns fan, though, the temptation is to root for Mark Cuban to somehow spontaneously combust during the elimination show. And that's not even mentioning his alarmingly offensive hobo routine.

But seriously, who are these dudes? Cameron Mathison? Albert Reed? To quote someone doing a crappy Jerry Seinfeld impression, "who are these people?" How is it that as this show gets more popular, the celebrities get worse? Are they just running out of people that we've heard of that are willing to devote time to learning how to dance and stuff? "Dancing with the Stars," season six, featuring one of the non-Nicole Scherzinger members of Eden's Crush and the reanimated corpse of Richard Mulligan!

'Boston Legal' 4.1 - Wig party

2007-09-25T23:23:00.000-07:00

Wacky lawyers? Three-time Emmy award winner James Spader in drag? Rampant cast changes? It must be the fourth season premiere of "Boston Legal"!

Plus, we've got the addition of John Larroquette to the cast (last seen killing himself on "House"), since we obviously needed another sexagenarian actor* on the show given that Rene Auberjonois isn't a series regular any more. Unfortunately, this character is not Dan Fielding 15 years later, as he's kind of a stiff instead of a swingin' ladies name. Disappointing given David E. Kelley's love of TV crossovers (remember "The Practice" meets "Ally McBeal," or as I called it, "Ally McPractice"?), but I'm sure they'll figure out some excuse for a Marsha Warfield guest shot.

Larroquette is even kind of playing the Auberjonois role (albeit surely he'll get in the court room mix more), as the über straightman who's just positively overwhelmed by all the hijinx at C,P&S. But, he showed up to Clarence's singing contest at the end of the episode, so that tension is probably gone. Phew. How long before the Clarence-Jerry Two Stooges act gets old, anyway?

Every season this show has a ton of cast changes, that are never really that well explained (or at all), only to be replaced by new character that will soon disappear mysteriously (remember that young lawyer dude that looked kind of like the lead singer of The Killers?). So yeah, apologies if we don't get too attached, young British lady lawyer. And Brad is an ADA now? OK, great.

The episode itself was alright. It's nice that there's a case that's going to last longer than one ep - there wasn't much of that last season.

*Alright, fine. John Larroquette doesn't turn 60 until November 25. Whatev.

Rudolph reined in

2007-09-25T15:07:00.000-07:00

Yeah, never mind. Maya Rudolph is coming back to "SNL" after all.

What a crazy roller coaster of emotions this has been! And the season premiere, I believe their 96th, is just a few days away - this Saturday, Sept. 29, with NBA megastar LeBron James as host and music genius/noted malcontent Kanye West as musical guest.

It's all good, but come on. No more Noonie/Noonie. Please.

'Dancing with the Stars' - Josie grossie

2007-09-24T20:52:00.000-07:00

Though co-host Samantha Harris was busy having a baby or something today, "Dancing with the Stars" is back. Of course, being a recognized international "Dancing with the Stars" expert (I talked about the show on the Shane Foxman show on CFUN in Vancouver, after all), I was watching.

First of all, I know they like to milk ratings, but six dances in 90 minutes is really pretty pathetic. That's like 12 minutes of dancing, a really disappointing dancerate. That's a lot of Tom Bergeron (and Drew Lachey, filling in for Harris) padding.

Sabrina Bryan, despite not being someone I've ever heard of, was surprisingly awesome, and they netted a 26 - a tie for the best first-week score ever with season three's powerhouse Mario Lopez/Karina Smirnoff team. Jennie Garth was there. Jane Seymour and Marie Osmond were pleasant enough for people old enough to be my mother - it's nice to see older women on the show for a change, as we've always gotten old dudes (Peterman, George Hamilton, Jerry Springer, Cliff Claven).

Josie Maran, with her 16 out of 30, is an easy pick for the first cut, and I can say that pretty confidently even before any of the men have performed. Despite being terribly attractive, no one knows who she is (Shandi Finnessey syndrome), and she got a freakin' 16 out of 30. Women have a harder time on the show with voters anyway (the voters love hot men/adorably old men), and even if Wayne Newton's hip explodes tomorrow, I still see her getting the first boot.

Maya Rudolph: GET OOOOUUUUUTTTTT

2007-09-24T20:01:00.000-07:00

Despite TV Guide's illustrious Michael Ausiello reporting that she's staying, Maya Rudolph, is, in fact, leaving "Saturday Night Live."

Even though she's definitely done some funny stuff - "Wake Up, Wakefield," y'all - it's been about seven years (she started when I was still in high school! yikes!), and I think this is probably the right time for her. Mainly because I'm psyched about not having to see another "Noonie/Noonie" sketch (they have wacky furniture!). Those are "Mad TV"-unfunny (now all we have to do is get rid of "Deep House Dish"). And even though I'm a Rudolph fan and a lot of people seem to love it, I was never sure as to what the point of impersonating Whitney Houston was in the year 2007.

Still, though, she's a real team player, as evidenced by her many roles over the years and many ethnicities she was able to play. Rudolph hasn't been in a ton of non-"SNL" things (she was funny in "Idocracy," though) and I sure hope we'll see her being funny somewhere soon, perhaps in the Judd Apatow-comedy tree mix.

And now there's only two women on "SNL" - Kristen Wiig and Amy Poehler. Two great, great women, but still. We'll see how long that's the case.

You'll be missed!

Manic Monday

2007-09-24T18:13:00.000-07:00

Huge, huge, HUGE night tonight. At 7 on CBS, we've got the third season premiere of "How I Met Your Mother," which features the achingly handsome Enrique Iglesias and the ever-effervescent Mandy Moore (playing, hi-lariously, AGAINST TYPE! as a tattooed bad girl) and returns to the single Ted on the prowl action we've all missed.

Then, AT THE EXACT SAME TIME, we've got the series premiere of "Chuck," which of course we've all been looking forward to for months. Well, we've all been seeing promos for it on NBC during "Office" repeats for months, at least. And lots of banner ads online. He's the secret, she's the agent - did you know that? Call me crazy, but I think sparks are going to FLY between those two! Plus, always good to see a "Less Than Perfect" alum in a starring role.

And then, yes, AT THAT SAME EXACT TIME AS THE OTHER TWO SHOWS, there's the fifth season premiere of the almighty "Dancing with the Stars." Aside from Kelly Taylor and Dr. Quinn, the celebrities are all pretty lame this season (Mark Cuban? Wayne Newton? A bunch of people I've never heard of?), but at this point I'm into it more for the professional dancers, as I've become big fans of a lot of them - so psyched to see Anna Trebunskaya back in the mix! And also, um, I like football. I am a manly man! I won't watch "The Bachelor," though. I have my limits.

Then at 8 p.m., of course, the big return of "Heroes" for a second season, which is really just a countdown until Kristen Bell shows up for me. Well, Masi Oka in samurai garb, as seen on the cover of this week's EW, is also pretty alluring.

And then there's "The Big Bang Theory," "Journeyman" and other things I probably won't watch. Is it at least somewhat depressing that the new CBS sitcom is the second thing that pops up when you Google "the big bang theory." I mean, you would hope that at least, say, the top three results were for the actual scientific theory.

And, if I were writing cheesy headlines about tonight's new shows, they'd read like this: "Subscribe to 'The Big Bang Theory,'" "You should be 'up' with 'Chuck" and "Take a trip with 'Journeyman.'" If they suck, just add "not" or "don't" to those.

Bell hooked

2007-08-08T15:43:00.000-07:00

In news seemingly conjured up in a fanboy's hot, sweaty, sticky dreams, our beloved Kristen Bell, she of "Veronica Mars" (the amazing yet now-canceled show that I have been spotted cuddling the DVD boxes of) has been linked to a new role on the show on the forefront of most every geek's minds - "Lost." Potentially the greatest intersection of awesome pop culture things since "Cartoon All-Stars to the Rescue." You might as well have told me that Spider-Man and Boba Fett were coming to my birthday party.

Nothing's official, yet, but it's also exciting when you think about the implications it has on "Lost." Given what happened at the end of the still boner-hardening third season finale, there are plenty of opportunities to introduce new characters - like the one Bell may or may not play, a "precocious, loquacious and funny" 20something named Charlotte (the 27-year-old Bell playing her age would be kind of disorienting at first).

KB has two movies coming out - including "Forgetting Sarah Marshall," which sounds promising and has a lot of the Apatow gang in it (Paul Rudd, Jonah Hill and "How I Met Your Mother" dude Jason Segel, who wrote the film and stars opposite Bell). IMDb says they've both wrapped, though, presumably leaving her schedule clear to get her "Lost" on. Aww yeah. She's also narrating the new CW series "Gossip Girl," so who knows how that will all shake out - although presumably it'll only be a problem is "GG" isn't canned by the time "Lost" returns in February 2008 (sigh, so far away).

Finally, what does it say about this Internet of ours that this picture is the first to come up when you Google "Kristen Bell"?

Enrique I-wait for it-glesias

2007-08-08T15:26:00.000-07:00

Surely you're wondering what "How I Met Your Mother" has up its sleeve for the show's upcoming third season - apparently, late '90s/early '00s pop stars! It's like my senior prom all over again, except with slightly less awkward teen dry humping.

The venerable "Entertainment Tonight" reports that Mandy Moore, fresh from the by all accounts laughless "Licensed to Wed" (or as I call it, "Licensed Towed") will be showing up in at least one episode as a "rebound" gal for Ted, who of course pulled the inevitable plug in his relationship with Robin (whose character is a former Canadian pop star. wild!) on the second season finale. The article quotes EP Carter Bays describing Moore's role as "the tattooed, vodka-swilling trainwreck that Mandy Moore thankfully never turned into." Who could he possibly be referring to?

And according to the ever-effervescent Michael Ausiello, none other than Enrique Iglesias himself will show up starting up with the show's Sept. 24 season premiere, in two episodes as Robin's latest love interest. Whoa, is it smoldering in here or is it just that juicy piece of casting news? It comes at a weird time for me personally, as I hadn't thought about Enrique Iglesias in years (probably in 2003 when he was pretty good in a tiny role in "Once Upon A Time In Mexico") before he was on the local news a couple days ago for some reason (not this reason, sadly "How I Met Your Mother" casting news doesn't make the local news like it used to), and now, here I am, not only thinking about him, but writing about him! No word on if he'll let the rhythm take him over or want to live this night forever.

Upfrontin' - Fox shows what they're going to stall time with before "American Idol" starts

2007-05-17T14:50:00.000-07:00

It's the last day of the upfronts, and the two youngest networks - Fox and The CW - announced their fall lineups. "Veronica Mars"-free. Ick. Also, "The War at Home"-free. Yay!

Here's what we've got from Fox:

FOX PRIMETIME SCHEDULE: FALL 2007 (All Times ET/PT)

MONDAY
8:00-9:00 PM PRISON BREAK
9:00-10:00 PM K-VILLE

"K-Ville" is about cops in post-Katrina New Orleans. Interesting, and I hope it shows to more people that New Orleans is still in bad shape, almost two years later.

TUESDAY
8:00-9:00 PM NEW AMSTERDAM
9:00-10:00 PM HOUSE

"New Amsterdam," other than being an Elvis Costello song, is about an immortal detective. Kind of like "Moonlight" on CBS, which is about a vampire detective. And you know, all of the other shows that have been like that.

WEDNESDAY
8:00-8:30 PM BACK TO YOU
8:30-9:00 PM 'TIL DEATH
9:00-10:00 PM BONES

"Back To You" is sort of like "Anchorman" but on TV, and with Kelsey Grammer instead of Will Ferrell and Patricia Heaton instead of Christina Applegate. Still has Fred Willard, though. I'm actually sort of psyched for it. I have a sneaking suspicion it'll be bad, though.

THURSDAY
8:00-9:00 PM ARE YOU SMARTER THAN A 5th GRADER?
9:00-10:00 PM KITCHEN NIGHTMARES

"Kitchen Nightmares" is a new reality show with Gordon Ramsay, a.k.a. the "Hell's Kitchen" dude, where he travels around the country helping u. Yes, this is a weird choice for a fall lineup. Seems very summer-y, or like something that should be on basic cable, given the many, many, cable shows that are exactly like this.

FRIDAY
8:00-9:00 PM THE SEARCH FOR THE NEXT GREAT AMERICAN
BAND (working title)
9:00-10:00 PM NASHVILLE (working title)

"Great American Band" = "American Idol" with more people. "Nashville" is a "docu-soap," like "Laguna Beach" or (ugh) "Tuesday Night Book Club," about the music industry there. Sounds like a CMT show. Wow.

SATURDAY 8:00-8:30 PM COPS
8:30-9:00 PM COPS
9:00-10:00 PM AMERICA'S MOST WANTED: AMERICA FIGHTS BACK
11:00 PM-MIDNIGHT MADtv
MIDNIGHT-12:30 AM TALK SHOW WITH SPIKE FERESTEN

No surprises here. On "The Howard Stern Show," Artie Lange had been talking about possibly getting a show post-"Spike Feresten," but apparently that's not (yet) the case.

SUNDAY
7:00-8:00 PM THE OT (NFL post-game)
8:00-8:30 PM THE SIMPSONS
8:30-9:00 PM KING OF THE HILL
9:00-9:30 PM FAMILY GUY
9:30-10:00 PM AMERICAN DAD

Nothing new here, really, except no more "The War at Home" and "The Winner" being official toast (not surprising). "American Dad" just keeps going, man. Who could say why. And if you had bet me cash monies whenever "King of the Hill" started (I think I was in junior high), that it'd still be going on in 2007, I would owe you said cash monies.

Their midseason shows sound a lot more promising. "The Return of Jezebel James," starring the ever-effervescent Parker Posey and Lauren Ambrose, is from "Gilmore Girls" creator Amy Sherman-Palladino, and "The Rules of Starting Over" is of course the infamous show Karen on "The Office" (or Rashida Jones, as she is "really called") will be on - along with Craig Bierko, he's always entertaining. Plus, Julianna Margulies is on Yet Another Legal Drama called "Canterbury's Law."

Then there's "The Sarah Connor Chronicles," because what TV needs more of is shows based on characters from 23-year-old sci-fi franchises. I can't wait for the "Johnny 5 Chronicles"!

Next up - The CW.

"Veronica Mars" watch - Day 866

2007-05-17T11:44:00.000-07:00

Damn.

If the Suns lose Friday this is the worst week ever.

If you need me, I’ll be on my roof.

More thoughts to come. Right now it's just too soon.

On the bright side, Kristen Bell is the narrator for the new CW show "Gossip Girl." Who needs to watch her on a great show where you can hear her disembodied voice in a show based on a series of young adult novels called "Gossip Girl"? P.S. the answer is me. Sigh.

Wednesday weepings

2007-05-17T10:09:00.000-07:00

"American Idol" - Blake in the finals? Exsqueeze me? I baking powder? This guy isn't even lame in the fun, goofy, Taylor Hicks way, he's just totally lame. That video package of him heading back home to the Puget Sound area was INTOLERABLE. I always thought Seattle seemed like a cool place to live but now I'm strongly questioning that. At one point Jordin seemed like a clear favorite, but this dork obviously has a lot of support. At this point, the finals are simply - much like the 2000 presidential election - too close to call.

Melinda really was great, but she never had the starpower to win the whole thing. But seeing Blake get further than her really sucks.

"America's Next Top Model" - I haven't watched this all season, but turned in to it enough to see that "Jaslene" won. Um...yay?

"Lost" - Not much to weep about here. Another awesome episode. This show is on a roll like no other. Obviously Charlie wasn't going to drown (they're not going to tell us he's going to drown and then actually have him drown - that's just not the "Lost" way) but watching him go down there was excruciating - and then - he's OK! And then - a bunch of babes with guns are about to shoot him! And then - end of episode! Ack. His unnecessary paddle smack to the head of Desmond was also pretty great. One wonder if this means a Juliet triple cross.

Phoenix Suns game - UGH. Gave me as many ulcers as this whole "fate of 'Veronica mars'" thing. Speaking of which, watch this space for more news on that very soon. But man, I hate the Spurs. Seriously, I do not like those guys at all.

Schrödinger's Starbuck

2007-03-05T15:06:00.000-08:00

In a mystery worthy of Mulder and Scully (or at least that guy from Terminator 2) Cox cable in Tucson has relegated Sci Fi to their “variety tier” on digital cable. When I was in Phoenix, I took its being a part of “normal” cable for granted; then when I got here I found out it was exiled along with oddities like Encore WAM! and the Fox Reality Channel, while far less appealing (to me, anyway) channels such as Hallmark, Oxygen and Versus were part of the basic package. Joni Mitchell was right. You really don’t know what you’ve got until it’s gone.

So I’m currently living with my sister and brother-in-law right now, and am trying not to jeopardize this temporary, freeloading status with initiating sweeping changes to their way of life. They only have basic cable, and don’t seem interested in upgrading. I (try to) deal.

The timing couldn’t be worse, though, with the third season of “Battlestar Galactica” heading into the home stretch. I’ve been downloading the episodes I miss on iTunes the next day, which works just fine, but means I don’t have that instant satisfaction of experiencing it with the rest of the world. That hasn’t been too much of a problem with a couple of relatively uneventful episodes the last few weeks, but that’s no longer the case.

For weeks, it’s been speculated – in sources like this – that something bad would happen to Starbuck on the March 4 episode (“executive producers David Eick and Ron Moore say that a ‘profound’ event involving Starbuck does occur a pivotal Season 3 episode called ‘Maelstrom’ that is scheduled to air March 4,” says the Chicago Tribune). That article ran in early January, I actually had forgotten about it.

Until last night.

A buddy instant messaged me right after the episode aired here, not knowing that I wasn’t able to see it. “How about that,” he asked. I told him that I hadn’t watched it yet, but the damaged had already been done. Now I know something significant happened, 99.9% involving Starbuck. Is she dead? Is she a Cylon? Is she pregnant with Lee Adama’s love child?

I woke up early this morning to see if it was on iTunes yet. It wasn’t. Am I really going to be able to avoid online spoilers until I can watch?

So, much like Schrödinger’s cat, Kara Thrace remains, at least for me, in some sort of mysterious netherworld between alive and dead. So much for death with dignity.

Cliff jumping

2007-03-02T12:01:00.000-08:00

John Ratzenberger has brought balance to the Force. The former Cliff Clavin has taken Vincent Pastore’s place on “Dancing with the Stars,” so in case you couldn’t sleep, worried sick that the show wouldn’t have a 60-year-old* former TV star, you can rest easy tonight!

Ratzenberger (not to be confused with the Pope, I think his name is “Ratzinger”) has most recently been heard – not seen – in all the Pixar movies. So kids across America will probably be disappointed when they find out its some older dude, not Hamm from “Toy Story,” cutting rugs on ABC.

*In the interest of fairness, Razenberger doesn’t turn 60 until April 6. Additionally, I thought he’d be older than that by now.

Cameo (Word Up)

2007-02-08T11:55:00.000-08:00

Better cameo on last night's "Lost":

This guy:

Or this guy:

Between that episode and "Smokin' Aces," it's really been a banner 2007 for Luis from "Suddenly Susan."

Good episode, too.

Spoiled sport

2007-02-08T11:34:00.000-08:00

Here's some news that revealed a little more than your average "this pilot is in development" story. Fox has greenlit a pilot for "The Rules of Starting Over," an oddly generic-sounding sitcom starring Craig Bierko. Now, Bierko's been on "Boston Legal" all season, but just this week we found out that he wasn't the father of Denise's baby and his role has gradually decreased from the fall. Add to that the fact that show has a revolving door cast anyway, it's not that surprising that he's got other stuff in the works.

What is slightly more surprising, though, is revealed in the last paragraph: "Rashida Jones also has been cast in the pilot, playing a partner at a law firm looking for a decent guy."

Even if the show doesn't get picked up, that's obviously a big clue for the future of Jaren (not that you couldn't guess it from the way the last couple episodes have went). I was sort of hoping she'd stick around and serve a purpose other than to torture Jim and Pam 'shippers for another season (not that that isn't a noble pursuit). At least I still have Andy.

You think you know a gay: Revisited

2007-01-22T15:24:00.000-08:00

Looks like, months after the original incident, Isaiah Washington may be fired for his use of gay slurs. This, of course, opens up a whole can of discriminatory worms - firing one of the few African-American quasi-leads on a hit show. Especially one that is dating an Asian character. Why couldn't it have been a white guy that was homophobic? That is so racist of T.R. Knight.

New-dio 60

2007-01-22T15:05:00.000-08:00

It's back! Now that there's been enough time to react to all of the bad reviews the show has gotten, I can't wait for the "TV critics don't have the right to criticize my show" episode. Nah, actually I started to honestly...enjoy? "Studio 60" the last couple of weeks before the hiatus, heavy-handedly co-opting the tragedy of Hurricane Katrina aside. However, it is really annoying to see the commercials that act like Danny/Jordan (or as I call them, "JorDan") are some sort of fated, star-crossed lovers when that's barely been played up at all on the show. Tonight, the gang takes on the FCC! Take that, conservative patriarchy! (actually, the FCC is a pretty great target, if not done to death, for Sorkin's distinctive, left-leaning preachyness). Here's an interesting article about us folks who actually like the show.

Also new tonight: "Heroes." Are YOU on the list? Probably not. You're not a fictional character.

Short jacked

2007-01-11T11:49:00.000-08:00

Cool. Way cooler than McFarlane Toy's "Lost" figures, which were neat but included such shelf-cloggers as "Shannon in a bikini," "Charlie with full-sized Driveshaft ring replica" and "Hurley." According to USA Today, always first with your action figure news, there are plans for a few other Jack toys but maybe not any other characters. That makes sense. Do we really need a tiny Gregory Itzin sitting on our mantle?

Family Ties

2007-01-03T15:08:00.000-08:00

With last night's lametacular series premiere of "Dirt," and tonight's surely atrocious premiere of "In Case of Emergency," I think that Courtney Cox and David Arquette are about to set a record for the worst shows by a husband and wife simultaneously on TV. The old record was probably "Ink."

But seriously, has there ever been a bigger crop of losers on a show than "ICoE"? David Arquette, Kelly Hu, Greg Germann, Jonathan Silverman and frickin' Aunt Becky? Amazing.

"Knights of Prosperity" is also on tonight, and as many people know, it was originally called "Let's Rob Mick Jagger," but he didn't want his name on the title (and probably rightly so). I thought "Knights of Prosperity" was at least the title of an obscure Stones tune or something, but, nope, it's just a stupid name.

OC: Officially Canceled

2007-01-03T14:56:00.000-08:00

It's sort of weird for a show to end after only four seasons, and I guess it's a testament to the current climate (where series are axed after one episode - "Emily's Reasons Why Not," we're looking at you, right?) that it seems like it's been on for a while. It was supposed to be this generation's "90210," and I guess it's better that it's ending rather than going on for years too long and bringing in a countless number of lame characters.

But anyway, "The O.C." has been canceled. I watched it back when it was the cool thing for people my age (well, slightly younger than me), and ditched it when it was the cool thing to ditch.

In other cancellation news, "The Megan Mullally Show" has gotten the ol' boot, meaning she lasted a shorter amount of time than Tony Danza, Caroline Rhea of Wayne Brady. I think even "The Magic Hour" was on a bit longer.

Auld lang syne language

2007-01-02T12:11:00.000-08:00

AND WE'RE BAAAHHHHHHHHHCK. It's a new year full of new posts here at the ol' Channel Surfing. Here's the top ten list for 2006.

In case you don't like reading, here's the quick list:

1. “The Colbert Report”
2. “The Office”
3. “Battlestar Galactica”
4. “24”
5. “Rescue Me”
6. “South Park”
7. “Dog Bites Man”
8. “Veronica Mars”
9. “How I Met Your Mother”
10. “Arrested Development”

Predator 2: Still Predatorin'

2006-12-15T16:50:00.000-08:00

After "30 Rock" and "Studio 60" (along with everyone else ever) have both made jokes about Dateline NBC's "To Catch a Predator" series, I'm proud to announce that "To Catch a Predator" jokes are...officially no longer funny. In fact, I'm pleased to announce that "To Catch a Predator" jokes are the inaugural recipients of the brand new Channel Surfing Dane Cook No Longer Funny Award!

Don't worry, maybe they'll make a comeback in a few years, like OJ jokes.

Almost almost famous

2006-12-15T00:41:00.000-08:00

Oh boy - as an alleged journalist, this reality show has some degree of interest to me - even though I don't really have any ambitions to write for Rolling Stone (or any ambitions at all, really, but that's my own deal). I briefly considered entering the contestant pool, but seeing that picture and the blonde chick's legs on display makes me think I might not have had what they were looking for (my legs are much nicer).

Upon checking out the individual bios, it's fun to see what books these people are pretending to have read, and I especially enjoy Colin Stutz, who says that in high school he was, "the dick of all dicks." They even have their own Taylor Hicks in Russell Morse, a purported 26-year-old that looks around 40.

Double 'fficed

2006-12-15T00:25:00.000-08:00

Not as good as last year's Christmas episode, but still really funny - all the stuff with the waitresses was weird, as it stretches the loseriffic credibility of Michael Scott that he'd be delusional enough to think they were into him, and it was a little more dark than this show's tone usually is (hitting on possibly underaged women, subtle racism, stealing bikes), but it didn't detract too much.

I love Michael and Andy's fist explosion.

It seems that they're already telegraphing the Jim/Karen break-up, which is annoying, since we haven't even really gotten a chance at all to see them as a couple (other than seeing them exchange "Bridget Jones and the Edge of Reason." that really IS a bad movie, I saw it in the theater for some reason). There's star-crossed lovers and then there's a point where you can't really root for characters who clearly could have acted a little more adult with their feelings for each other and now can't move past it when they have compelling reasons to do so. The apparent determination of turning Jim/Pam into the Rosschel of the 21st century is getting old. I just don't want to see Karen go the way of the purse girl, darn it.

Dwangela continues to be the real sweetest couple on TV; who her "Little Drummer Boy" rivaled Kevin's "You Oughta Know." It helps that she was on "Conan" about a week ago and seemed really charming in her real life persona (also named Angela, which is somewhat confusing). Angela...double fudge.

"Too soon."

I really liked the water balloon bit on "Scrubs." "30 Rock" really does seem to get better each episode, and I hope this isn't it for Dean Winters, since he's always a treat, and he got shot to death on his other show.

Toby really wanted that robe.

What's golden?

2006-12-15T00:23:00.000-08:00

Golden Globe nominations. Yawn. I hope Borat, either the movie or the fictional character, win. Go Hugh Laurie, although I am dubious as to Alec Baldwin's status as a lead on "30 Rock" (not, though, on his status as being award-worthy).

Game face

2006-12-13T23:24:00.000-08:00

Notes for future editions of the Spike TV Video Game Awards:

LESS musical performances from girly man-fronted pop-punk band AFI and presentations from Joe Rogan-level celebs (including, but not limited to, Joe Rogan).

MORE nerdy video game designers accepting awards in "hip" clothes.

Sarah Silverman's bit was expectedly hilarious. "You guys should kill yourselves."

It's cool that Samuel L. Jackson is hosting this since he's like 60.

Boyle over

2006-12-13T15:35:00.000-08:00

Now I feel bad for hating "Everybody Loves Raymond."

R.I.P.

DAD FROM RAYMOND
1935-2006

Blog it out

2006-12-13T14:49:00.000-08:00

Rosie O'Donnell has finally apologized for making fun of Asians. Kind of. It was on her famously incomprehensible blog:

Ben writes:

You say how you dont understand what the fuss is about, but its hard 2 understand w/o having grown up Asian. Imagine a derogatory gay joke. If YOU got bent outta shape about it, I WOULD understand…

ben
i am sorry it hurt u
i didnt think of it the way it was taken
i will b more sensitive
promise

Allow me to offer up Channel Surfing's official retort:

rosie
u said my last name a lot during that bit
it wasnt very funny
but i liked u in league of their own
that was a while ago

The whole thing has made me think about how us "model minority" Asians aren't actually the only minority group left that it's OK to make fun. That's still handicapped people.

In case you missed it somehow:

Thinly spread

2006-12-13T14:32:00.000-08:00

Good news, nerds! "Battlestar Galactica" vixen Tricia Helfer will appear in next month's Playboy, which is apparently still being published despite the ease of finding naked pictures of anyone that appears in it through many Internet souces. Here's their oh-so clever text about the pix:

"Tricia Helfer -- On Battlestar Galactica she's known as Number Six, but we can't think of her as anything less than a 10. The leggy former top fashion model makes love to our camera in quite the spread."

Prepare your Google image searches!

I've recently heard people saying that Helfer looks like David Bowie. If you're a female that's going to be compared to any male, I guess Bowie is a good one, but come on - she looks a man...if he were a woman.

Tuck Everlasting

2006-12-13T14:08:00.000-08:00

I've heard some mixed things about last night's season finale of "Nip/Tuck" - actually, pretty much all negative things. Mainly that "not enough happened." That's natural, because a lot of things actually got wrapped up last week when creepy Jacqueline Bisset offed herself - the Escobar stuff was kind of tacked-on at the last minute, and by that nature it had to be resolved fairly quickly and tidily.

In a larger sense, it's sort of perturbing that "stuff has to happen" for a show to be good - big, sweeping events instead of just important character moments - and also, how was this not a lot of "stuff" happening? Liz finally confronting Escobar and getting some sort of closure with being shot and having her kidney stolen, Escobar gone, the Michelle situation dealt with (albeit off-camera), a nice Sean/Matt scene and biggest of all, a new status quo in LA (I'm not sure, though, what happened with Wilbur). Seems pretty packed to me. It's not a spooky guy in a mask chopping off fingers, but that's probably best.

It did seem, though, that this would be a nifty series finale - all the ongoing storylines wrapped-up and a new beginning and happy ending for Christian and Sean - but that apparently isn't the case.

The big question in my mind is will "Brighter Disconnect" by the Submarines (the tune lip-synced in the over-extended musical sequence) be the next "Breathe Me" by Sia?

List off

2006-12-12T16:16:00.000-08:00

Looks like you better stick to watching movies, American Film Institute. The AFI, not to be confused with girly man-fronted pop-punk band AFI, released their top 10 TV shows of the year, effectively sticking their snooty, elitists noses in our heretofore-unpretentious tube watching. Let's take a look at the pics, in alphabetical order (notice how they're too cowardly to do proper rankings):

Battlestar Galactica
Dexter
Elizabeth I
Friday Night Lights
Heroes
The Office
South Park
24
The West Wing
The Wire

Alright, movie boys, let's see where you went wrong. "Elizabeth I," huh? Oh man, I just couldn't wait each week to see the next crazy, wacky, unpredictable turn or how that wily Elizabeth I would get out of her next jam, and who doesn't remember that action-packed season finale - oh wait, that's a lie. Because "Elizabeth I" wasn't a series, it was a two-part mini-series! And not only that, it's not even American! You might as well have put one of PBS's airings of 15-year-old Britcom "Keeping Up Appearances." Plus, look at the picture - any production that makes up Helen Mirren into something from Boner Stopper Magazine is hardly the "best" anything.

Including "Dexter" when clearly the Showtime series catching buzz this year is "Weeds" is also weird. It's no "Dexter's Laboratory," that's for sure. "South Park" has indeed been on point this season, but where's "The Colbert Report," the most culturally-influential show on TV this year by a good mile?

"24," "BSG," "The Wire" and "The Office" are fine and sort of required picks if you want to sound smart like a smart guy. Putting "The West Wing" on there seems like wanting to suck up to Aaron Sorkin but not quite being to muster the courage required in saying that "Studio 60" is any good. "Friday Night Lights" and "Heroes" are two shows that seem to be good just because everyone has universally agreed on saying that they're good - even though I do enjoy the latter (although it kind of is "Lost" for dumb people at this point).

To help you get the taste of this so-called "list" out of your mouth, I'll be presenting the Channel Surfing "Surfies" for the past year or so in the near future - be glued to your desktop, laptop, PDA, phone or PSP folks. Or for my homeless fans, check it out at your local library.

Extra, Extra, Extra

2006-12-12T16:07:00.000-08:00

This is fairly exciting - although weird that he would seemingly change his mind so quickly on the matter (Gervais has been pretty consistently adamant about no more than two series...es of "Extras").

I'm actually pretty chuffed about the idea; sure it's admirable that Ricky G. wants to preserve artistry and all that, but I'm pretty sure there's more than six hours (even "The Office" got the Christmas special) of funniness that can be squeezed out of movie stars playing really dumb versions of themselves. It just doesn't make sense that we get fifteen or so seasons of "Arli$$" and only two "Extras."

And oh yeah, for those of you who haven't obtained it through legally questionable means, series 2 begins on HBO on January 14.

I can't stand it

2006-12-12T15:57:00.000-08:00

I know you've been wondering, feverishly, where I've been - here I am. There's just not much to say these days. "House" and the "Nip/Tuck" season finale tonight should be good. Last night's "How I Met Your Mother" (now officially abbreviated "HIMYM," which I pronounce "him-yim") was alright but (and believe it) not nearly as funny as the Wayne Brady episode.

If you haven't seen this yet, here it is. It's pretty nifty - I'm having trouble deciding if it's just a lot more dirty than normal "Scrubs" humor of if it just seems more dirty since it's coming out of the mouths of "Peanuts" characters.

I don't want no Scrubs (but actually I do)

2006-12-01T00:20:00.000-08:00

If you're going to accidentally impregnate someone, Elizabeth Banks is certainly as good of a choice as any. Really. I've always liked her since she seems to turn up only in cool things ("Scrubs," "The 40-Year Old Virgin," "Slither," as Betty Brant in the Spider-Man movies, "The Baxter"). The fact that I certainly wouldn't kick her out of bed for eating crackers is (mostly) secondary.

All in all, great to see "Scrubs" back, even if Dr. Cox's hair for most of the episode looked like sort of like the clown from "It." The promos about Carla being pregnant for 17 months are funny. And true.

"30 Rock" was its usually quasi-amusing self. More Tracy Morgan, less Jane Krakowski, please. That's actually a funny thing to want because it's what Alex Baldwin's character wanted in the beginning of the series. It's fairly ironic to see Tracy as the crazy, unbalanced star in a comedy given what's happening in real life.

I watched my usual 12 minutes or so of "Earl." Seemed fine enough.

The real main event was "The Office" written by my main men Ricky Gervais and Stephen Merchant - great stuff. Jesus. Apollo Creed. Another Stamford guy quits, makes sense given that it'd be a little overcrowded after a while with all those folks. Andy's 'horny" conversation with Jim was worth the price of admission (which is, to say, free. but still great).

Doubting Thomas

2006-11-30T22:03:00.000-08:00

Much like everyone else, I thought the wrap-up to the "campus rapist" storyline on "Veronica Mars" was pretty nifty - especially seeing CW-ized Logan finally do something not wimpy and lame. Yet that doesn't stop me having some serious reservations about this season, and articles like this, an interview conducted by a fawning Kristin Veitch (is there any other kind?) with series creator Rob Thomas (not the Matchbox 20 guy), don't make me feel a lot better:

What’s the plan for the rest of the season?
Well, you’ll be the first person to hear this. There has been talk—more than talk—about dropping the whole big mystery idea after this middle mystery and to do all stand-alone episodes and sort of a combination of a few things. The network is behind it, and I am interested in heading in that direction.

So basically they're dumbing it down - further than the "three mini-mysteries," even. There are a lot of people who dug the first two seasons in large part because of the big mysteries - you knew there was going to be a payoff at the end (as opposed to "X-Files" or "Lost" or "The Nine," etc.) but you still had that many months of being tortured, trying to figure it out each week. We'll see what happens. As much as I liked this week's episode, it felt about 1/3 as dramatic as the season one and two finales.

But still:

R.I.P.

DEAN CYRUS O'DELL
194? or 195? - 2006

You didn't like Veronica very much at at first. Then you did. You had to deal with those militant feminists and keep the Greeks in line. You had a young hot wife that was secretly banging the young hot professor from "Saved by the Bell: The College Years." I saw the actor that plays you in "For Your Consideration" last week. He also narrated a couple educational videos I had to watch in high school. You probably drove a Hybrid car.

See you in the next TV show you guest star in.

Lbsed in the ratings

2006-11-30T11:46:00.000-08:00

The Mark Feuerstein streak continues - after just three weeks, "3 Lbs." is done. All eyes are on you, fellow ratings poison Josh Cooke and "Big Day," which got miserable ratings after its debut Tuesday.

Let's count the brain surgery/medical puns in the Variety article linked above:

1) "Brain drain: '3 Lbs.' goes to early grave"
2) "It's not brain surgery, but it's canceled."
3) "New CBS medical drama "3 Lbs." has been declared brain dead after just three weeks"
4) "the Eye has yet to pull the plug officially."
5) "After weighing the latest Nielsen numbers,"
6) "Killing "3 Lbs." was a no-brainer"

That's six puns in a 268 word article - which is a stunning 44 words-to-pun ratio. Clear space on your mantle for that Pulitzer, Adam Dawtrey, Josef Adalian and your collegue also named Josef Adalian.

Pull the plug

2006-11-21T00:45:00.000-08:00

More product placement talk - except this week it's on "Studio 60," so naturally it's just product placement with the best of intentions, and the resolution for it is the most intelligent, poignant and meaningful product placement in product placement history. So is "Peripheral Vision Man" a show within a show within a show?

Masi Oka was on "Conan." Good to see an Asian homeboy representin'. "Heroes" tonight at least had...something more going on than usual. A friend recently watched the entire season thus far back to back, and she dug it, and I think that it probably is better viewed in big chunks like that, but I'm still enjoying it so far. Thank goodness the cheerleader, and thus, the world, were both able to be saved.

Mall wonder

2006-11-21T00:38:00.000-08:00

Now, here is something on a much happier note. I don't know where the quasi-porn intro is, though. Speaking of CBS sitcoms, was "The Class"...actually funny today? Was I...laughing at it? Do I...like that show? Waa waa wii waa.

Lunatic cringe

2006-11-21T00:22:00.000-08:00

Yikes. That was the most awkward TV I've seen since Bill O'Reilly shouted down the son of a 9/11 victim and cut his mic off. Why did he insist on saying "Afro-Americans" twice? Did he really think that was a good idea? What a creepy dude. Jerry Seinfeld chastising the audience ("Stop laughing. It's not funny") was pretty something, too.

Albert was right

2006-11-20T13:50:00.000-08:00

You heard it here first, folks: I boldly predicted that the O.J. Simpson special wouldn't ever actually air, and here's a surprise, I was right. Actually, it shouldn't be too much of a surprise for loyal "Channel Surfing" devotees, not only did I fearlessly proclaim Emmitt Smith winner of "Dancing with the Stars" more than 24 hours before he officially won that title, I also declared "Smith" the first cancellation of the fall season back in July or something, when such a claim would have made me look off my nut. Stick with me, Surfers, together we'll make a difference in this crazy world.

The Racist Adventures of Old Cosmo

2006-11-20T11:56:00.000-08:00

We've all seen this by now, right? "Hipster doofus," indeed. Apparently racism has replaced Kabbalah as the hot new thing in Hollywood. They're exchanging red bracelets for white hoods! Why can't they do normal things like adopt African babies? I like how it says "WARNING: WHAT YOU ARE ABOUT TO SEE IS PROFANE AND RACIAL." Racial? Did David Brent write that copy? Stupid TMZ. I know "Seinfeld" always did poorly ratings-wise with black audiences so I guess this was him lashing out after all these years. It's weird that people were still laughing at the beginning of all the racismness. Maybe they thought it was Sacha Baron Cohen's latest character, TV's Michael Richards. Honestly, though, this is probably the most interesting thing you could ever expect to happen at a Michael Richards comedy show. Will future crowds be disappointed when he DOESN'T yell racist epithets? I guess there's a chance this is just a weird way to promote "Seinfeld" season 7 on DVD. "Look to the cookie," Kramer. STOLEN JOKE: "Now we know why he didn't take his lawyer's advice in the coffee suit." - Andre Olivie

Welcome to Miami (Bienvenidos a Miami)

2006-11-20T11:25:00.000-08:00

This is probably my favorite "viral video" ever (I still hate that term, though). It makes "CSI: Miami" look at least as silly (just not as over-the-top) as Conan made "Walker, Texas Ranger" look when he played all those clips a while back when NBC and Universal merged. I hope David Caruso never sees this because then he might stop doing it. I caught the beginning of a repeat this weekend just to see if he would do it, and - you guessed it - he did. So great. I love him dramatically putting the shades on, and of course, how he delivers every line the exact same way. Sometimes it's not even a pun or something, and there's still the dramatic smash to the credits. He's going to be the next Chuck Norris-type Internet legend. CARUSO 4 LIFE.

Fit but you know it

2006-11-17T16:49:00.000-08:00

New "Celebrity Fit Club" line-up. I liked the last round (a little bit), but this leaves me cold. They're really running out of celebrities, aren't they? Another Brady? Da Brat? Hasn't she been on like a million reality shows already? Cledus T. Judd? Kimberly Locke? I legitimately don't know who some of these people are.

I guess we're supposed to be interested in Screech since he's like, having sex on tape these days, but he's really just sort of a pathetic figure, especially given the super-stud his buddy Slater turned out to be.

Supersize glee

2006-11-17T15:19:00.000-08:00

I've had a day to think about it, and if that wasn't the best "Office" of all time, it was very near that mark (at least on par with the last "supersized" episode, "Casino Night"). It's sort of weird for an already-hilarious show in its third season, with an already large cast, to add a character that is as funny if not funnier than anyone else around, but I do believe they've done that in the form of Andy Bernard. He's not the showstopper, he's the whole f'n show.

But what made it really great is that despite the influx of new blood, the original, beloved, Scranton branch wasn't just pushed to the side. Everyone had great moments, especially Ryan, Kelly, and of course, season 3 MVP Creed ("Right place, right time).

"My Name Is Earl" was basically a PSA.

"30 Rock" was funny, but it's getting to the point where it's sort of depressing to like it since it's so obviously going to be gone soon, so like, why set yourself up for that kind of disappointment again? I don't think it's a stretch, though, to say that Tracy Morgan and Tina Fey are the second and third funniest people to come out of "SNL" in the last five years. Alec Baldwin is probably fourth.

But man, the NBC incest/product placement is getting crazy. Not only did we get "Friends" references in both "Earl" and "Rock" (not to mention "Office," hilariously, playing off "Lazy Sunday"), there was also the weird shredder from Staples thing. Also, playing up product placement as a gag (like Snapple on "30 Rock") was funny 14 years ago in the "Wayne's World" movie, but it's a little stale now, and seems sort of toothless when followed up by a commercial for the product you are "ironically" plugging.

On another note, how great is the new, longer lasting Axe effect? It's so new! And longer lasting!

Find me guilty

2006-11-15T21:41:00.000-08:00

How about that OJ? What a jerk, right? He's really resting on his laurels - milking a crime that's over a decade old? That's pretty lazy for a murderer. Everytime a big scandal sweeps the media, be it Lacey Patterson or Terri Schiavo or a Yankee pitcher flying his plane into a building, I hope that OJ is somehow masterminding the whole thing. What's the point of the special anyway? To give people tips on how to be better murderers? To let his kids know, in hindsight, how he really should have killed their mother? Although it's nice to see Fox returning to their slimy roots after flirting with credibility in recent years. We all miss the days of "When Animals Attack," "Celebrity Boxing" and "Let's give Michael Jackson time to tell us he's not a weirdo." I think by air date the bad buzz will be such that it'll likely never air, a la "Who's Your Daddy" or my even more controverisal reality show pilot, "Hiding in Kristen Bell's Bathroom." It's still unimaginable that any network (or book pubilsher) would even associate with the guy, especially this project ("Frogmen 2K6" would have been slightly more acceptable). Really, though, programming like this OJ special is exactly the kind of thing that makes me wish Jordan McDeere was a real television executive. Bad crack in the school yard, indeed.

Lopez dispensed

2006-11-15T20:56:00.000-08:00

Congratulations to the least embarrassing former NFL player in the news today!

Emmitt Smith "ran" away with the title, "touching down" with the trophy. Right? Mario Lopez was probably more solid throughout the season, but I think Emmitt passed him up as far as charisma and people were probably tiring of Mario's obvious headstart in terms of dance training. And when it comes to a duel between a Super Bowl champion and someone on "Saved By the Bell," it's fairly obvious who America is going to choose. Of course, a Latino going down to defeat through popular vote is probably just a reflection of growing anti-immigration sentiment.

It's nice to see Jesse Spano (and Kelly Kapowski!) showing up to cheer A.C. Slater. Besides this and all of Zach Morris' adventurous dramatic roles on short-lived/about to end TV series, it's obvious that they've all turned out to be pretty decent people. Except that one guy.

Take a chance on him

2006-11-14T23:23:00.000-08:00

ABC has been rolling out the promos for "Big Day," starting November 28 (not to be confused with "Day Break," which starts tomorrow). It looks well, uh - the important thing is that it stars Josh Cooke, which means this is his third midseason replacement in as many years. In 2005 he had "Committed," which starred Jennifer Finnigan (who inexplicably went on to star in an actually successful CBS legal drama) and Eddie Winslow. 2006 was "Four Kings," and I never watched that show and I've never met anyone who did.

He's quickly becoming the new Mark Feuerstein - the king of failed shows, including "Fired Up," "Conrad Bloom" and - of course - the beloved "Good Morning, Miami." To Bring It All Back Home, Mark Feuerstein has a new show ("3 Lbs.") which started tonight.

Word of warning to Mr. Cooke - don't make a video as lame as this one.

Future shock

2006-11-14T23:08:00.000-08:00

Who would guess that future Christian Troy would end up looking like Tony Clifton?

Well, that episode could have been a real disaster, but it was alright. It's always a red flag when shows put their leads in old person makeup - see the "Will & Grace" series finale - but I think this worked. And in exchange for this being her last episode, Joely Richardson must have lucked out in getting the future-self that aged the best.

This actually sort of felt like a nice season finale for the show, and made the "on the next" scenes (more Brooke Shields! more organ stealing hooker married to Burt Reynolds lady!) look pretty pedestrian.

Cowboy up

2006-11-14T19:11:00.000-08:00

Justin: who won DWTS
Albert: We won't know until tomoz
Justin: oh that's right
Justin: do you have an expert prediction
Albert: Emmitt
Albert: he's making a "run" for the championship
Justin: hee hee
Albert: I expect that trophy to "touch" "down" in his hands
Justin: Lopez: (Pacific) Blue Because He Lost

The greatest love story on TV this season is between Mario Lopez and Bruno Tonioli.

Of course they end up tied. Truly, it really is in our hands! Doesn't really seem right to me, since I think Emmitt's freestyle smoked Mario's, but whatev.

Ziering pain

2006-11-12T23:32:00.000-08:00

They recently had a shindig of sorts to celebrate "Melrose Place" and "Beverly Hills 90210" finally being released on DVD.

No doubt, I think, that Ian Ziering has aged the best of the lot - he looked 40 when he was supposed to be in high school, and he looks 40 now (even though he's 42!).

(Annoyed grunt)n't see this movie

2006-11-12T21:26:00.000-08:00

"The Simpsons" movie trailer. This really couldn't look worse. I guess it's hard to advertise a movie based on something we've all seen hours of - what can they show us that we haven't seen? - but maybe if there was some idea or indication as to why this movie even exists, and what they're going to be doing on a big screen they can't do on TV, it would be easier to show something. But instead this seems just like some sort of cheap cash-in for people like me who remember oh-so long ago when the show was actually funny.

I hate everything about this trailer. I hate the way the logo has a donut for the "O," which is a throwback to the first couple seasons of the show when they were known for things like Homer eating donuts and Bart being disrespectful to his parents. I hate the "A Hard Place" gag. I hate the Moe gag. I hate the fact that the 3D animal bit, which is ripe for parody, doesn't go anywhere and takes up 1/2 of the trailer.

There are conditions where a movie based on a TV show seem like a good idea - when a show was cancelled before its time and people want more ("Serenity"), when it's clear that the show could do more without the limits of TV ("Reno 911") or when there's strong nostalgia (any of dozens of crappy movies based on '60s or '70s sitcoms). But I'm not sure who a movie based on a TV show that most people are sick of that's way past its prime and on TV four times a day in every city in America is supposed to appeal to.

What I'm saying is that July 2007 can't come fast enough!

Brentmeister general

2006-11-10T16:33:00.000-08:00

This is brilliant. And less than three weeks away! And on the same day "Scrubs" returns! There are some pretty big spoilers in that link - awesome sounding ones. Of course, what would really be cool is David Brent for some reason in Scranton hanging out with Michael Scott, but that makes about as much sense as Chris Martin appearing on "When the Whistle Blows" in "Extras" series 2. So no, it actually wouldn't be cool.

In other news, Ricky Gervias apparently also has a funny face.

Pillow talk

2006-11-10T16:15:00.000-08:00

For some reason (well, because I knew Borat was going to be on) I actually watched Jay Leno last night, despite my best intentions to not watch that show. The best part of this is how desperately cool Martha Stewart tried to come across about everything. It's sort of getting to the Kermit the Frog level, though, of people annoyingly pretending that Borat is a real person in such situations. In case you missed it, here it is, but be warned there's one of those lame graphics that dudes who post things onto YouTube put on YouTube videos:

More great Martha bits, with her facing off against the beloved Amy Sedaris, here and here.

Dear studio audience, I've an announcement to make

2006-11-10T15:08:00.000-08:00

Oh thank goodness.

Cosbys say the darndest things

2006-11-09T15:07:00.000-08:00

A huge day for the Cos. Not only did he settle a lawsuit with a woman who said he drugged and sexually assaulted her, he's also coming to Phoenix! January 13, and tickets are reasonably priced between $45 and $55 bones. I wonder if he's going to tell jokes or act upset about things. Or drug and sexually assault people. Or make jokes about drugging and sexually assaulting people.

Branch out

2006-11-09T13:56:00.000-08:00

Holy poop. It's going to be an "Office" for the ages (spoilers in the link, natch).

Tuck and run

2006-11-09T12:02:00.000-08:00

Further evidence that this is going to be, I think, the last season of "Nip/Tuck." Or, as a friend suggested, "the midget will kill her off." I like the fact that she dated "in real life" the actor that plays Matt (her character's son) - that's probably one of the only relationships that hasn't happened in the show. Yet!

Another Sunny Day

2006-11-09T11:35:00.000-08:00

Catching up on things I missed out on during my sojourn: FX has renewed "It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia," this time for a whopping 15 eps (they had 10 last season and seven for their first). Not quite as heartening news: Danny DeVito will be back as well, and is committed to the show through season six, if they make it that far. I thought Danny DeVito was usually pretty funny on the show, but some episodes became a little too much about him than the main four characters, and while that wasn't bad, it wasn't what I originally liked so much about the show in the first place. I understood that his being there gave "IASIP" a lot more media attention than it would have had otherwise (and it really did), but I thought maybe it was just for a one-season arc now that they've landed on their feet. Guess not.

Still, one of my favorite shows, and I'm glad that it'll be back.

Ratings schmatings

2006-11-09T11:16:00.000-08:00

Our good friend Kristin Veitch is saying that the "back nine" of "Studio 60" is being "picked up" for a "full season" (TV Guide is reporting it, too). Not that surprising that NBC doesn't want to give up the goat after putting so much hype into it - this is, after all, the network that renewed "Joey."

But will they fulfill the fondest wishes of the forlorn "Friday Night Lights" fans?

On a side note, am I the only one who is wondering if we'll ever get to see the unaired episodes of "Joey"? Who knows what crazy turns Joey's relationship with Alex would have taken! And not to mention the wild antics of his nephew, and his sister, and that other dude. Good times.

Audit trail

2006-11-09T10:10:00.000-08:00

Spider-Man 3 trailer debuts tonight, on like every one of Viacom's channels. Hopefully they'll show more of Venom - I still think that's brilliant casting, Topher Grace as an arch-enemy for Tobey Maguire. There's something very post-modernly sensitive emo guy brilliant about that.

AICN had some images up a few days ago, but they've since been taken down. Bummer.

Ed Bradley of '60 Minutes' dead at 65

2006-11-09T09:26:00.000-08:00

I just heard this on CNN. Sad stuff, the guy was great - who even knew he had leukemia? Or that he was even sick? It's sort of uncomfortable to watch the anchors try and fill time with talking about how great a guy was when they just find out he dies, but they're doing their best, I suppose.

He hiatus me

2006-11-08T23:56:00.000-08:00

Three months without "Lost." What are we going to do until then? Read? Spend time with loved ones? Watch "Day Break"? All those choices seem ridiculous. At least we got some hot Sawyer/Kate action before the break (Sate? Kateyer?). Not to mention Nathan Fillion!

Taye Diggs should consult Bill Murray for help with his quandry, though.

Mac not tonight

2006-11-08T23:49:00.000-08:00

Can someone put V-Mars on the case as to where Mac has disappeared to? (I know they've technically explained her absence most episodes, but come on). It must be sort of a kick in the pants to be made a regular character on a show and then be on considerably less than you were before. The whole revolving cast thing is understandable due to budget concerns, but at least last season it was dealt with in a way that...made sense (Duncan fleeing to Australia, Wallace going off with his real dad). The way it's played out so far in season 3 is like if there were some "Friends" episodes with only Joey, Chandler and Monica, and some with Joey, Chandler, Monica and Ross, and some with Joey, Chandler and Ross, a few with Joey, Chandler and Phoebe, and maybe one even with Joey, Phoebe and Rachel, but never one with, you know. All six of those annoying people.

Ad nauseam

2006-11-08T23:41:00.000-08:00

The single greatest t-shirt and billboard in New York City, respectively:

Separated at birth?

2006-11-08T23:29:00.000-08:00

You think you know a gay II

2006-11-08T23:17:00.000-08:00

It's days old now, but I was out of town and it really feels like this is something I should be addressing. I'm not sure how surprising it is or isn't that ol' Swarley is gay, but I'm happy that he's happy. It's also neat that there are at least two gay actors playing straight guys on TV, especially a noted poon hound like NPH's "HIMYM" character. It's possible that they could annoyingly milk the irony of the latter, but the mere thought of that is giving me douche chills so let's not go there.

As a preventative measure, I'd like to out the following television personalities, just so I can say I was the first one to do so:

1) Anderson Cooper
2) Dane Cook
3) Jason Alexander
4) The Barefoot Contessa, Ina Garten
5) Collectively, The Backyardigans
6) Major Lee Adama
7) Ellen DeGeneres - between you and me, I think she's hiding something
8) Pro wrestlers Christopher Daniels and A.J. Styles
9) Christopher Meloni
10) Billy Bush

Voters: Whoa is Joey

2006-11-08T23:08:00.000-08:00

Not a surprise - Mario Lopez and Emmitt Smith are way more charismatic, lovable, and you know, better dancers. Joey was good, and seemingly a very nice kid, but Mario and Emmitt has been the obvious choice for the finals for the long time. It's also a second-to-last elimination that makes sense, unlike last year when the adorable Stacy Keibler got booted before not one but TWO less talented "hoofers." Plus, seeing a white person cut in favor of a black man and a Latino makes me feel like we were transported to that "White Man's Burden" universe. And it feels good.

Oh, how awkward, I see I've missed a couple of eliminations. Eek. How about "Voters: Spring Jerry" and "Voters: Give her lump of Coleman"? Maybe it's good I missed them.

Somebody save me

2006-11-01T15:48:00.000-08:00

It was only a matter of time:

http://www.savestudio60.com/

Calling it "FireFly" doesn't help their credibility in my eyes. This is my favorite part, their marching orders for the F.O.O.S. (Friends of ol' Sorkin):

1. Tell your friends about Studio 60.
2. Watch the show tonight
3. Tell your friends tomorrow how good Studio 60 was!

Yeah, because "Save Angel" worked so well.

You must see these television programs

2006-10-25T12:11:00.000-07:00

Here is some refreshingly refreshing news! We don't have to wait until January for new "Scrubs," it's coming back November 30 - and it's back in its original (and most natural) home of Thursday nights. Also encouraging: "30 Rock" being moved to Thursdays, effectively bringing back "Must See TV" (which they kind of did with "Will & Grace," "Four Kings," "My Name is Earl" and "The Office" last year, but come on). Perhaps the best news is that this seem to leave "Twenty Good Years" in the ditch.

Possible headlines: "Network doesn't want to live 'Twenty Good Years,'" "'Twenty Good Years' doesn't last four good episodes," "NBC cuts short 'Twenty Good Years,'" "'Twenty Good Years' is cancelled."

It ain't fiction, just a natural fact

2006-10-23T15:42:00.000-07:00

Amazingly, the NewsRadio FanFic Archive (which was inexplicably updated just *two* months ago) is no longer the weirdest fan fiction site on the Internet. That distinction now belongs to the Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip Fanfiction Community, where seemingly the only trope is Matt and Danny getting it on. Of course, straight characters going gay is sort of the reason fanfic was invented anyway.

Although it'll be very hard for "Studio 60" fan fiction to top the creepiness of this.

Conan the Adventurer

2006-10-23T11:36:00.000-07:00

This sounds fun. It's sort of a bummer that it has to be a repeat, it would be nice if technology had progressed to a point where live images of humans with skin, organs and that kind of stuff can be projected as skeletons (the fact that "Late Night" is never live doesn't stop me from wanting this).

Channel Surfing for Friday, October 20

2006-10-20T17:29:00.000-07:00

No longer satisfied from ripping from headlines, "Law & Order" is now ripping from shows that air on the same network. What's next, ripping stories from Jay Leno's "Headlines"?

Law & Order
9 p.m., NBC
It’s not just “ripped from the headlines” — it’s shades of “Dateline NBC” series “To Catch a Predator” when Green (Jesse L. Martin) and Cassady (Milena Govich) investigate the death of a man who was identified by a TV newsmagazine as a pedophile who trolled the Internet for victims.

I really enjoy that picture of Jesse L. Martin because it looks like he just smelled something gross.

There's some other stuff tonight - the return of "Extreme Makeover" (I think) and also "Battlestar Galactica." The people who haven't dug the New Caprica story will like this episode, I think. Or not. Whiners. Read here.

Situation Normal: All Fragged Up

2006-10-20T17:25:00.000-07:00

Words to live by:

Dance your cares away,
Worry's for another day.
Let the music play,
Down at Fraggle Rock.

Yep..."Fraggle Rock" movie in development.

You think you know a gay

2006-10-20T17:17:00.000-07:00

So T.R. Knight, George from "Grey's Anatomy," is gay. Thanks a lot, People, first Lance Bass, now this. Who's the next paragon of manliness that's going to threaten our family values with their "lifestyle"? Nathan Lane? Tim Gunn? J. Alexander?

On a serious note, here's an interesting article about the whole thing.

Channel Surfing for Thursday, October 19

2006-10-19T17:48:00.000-07:00

It's Thursday, so always a lot going on, including the strangely resurgent "ER" - I've actually thought the show was solid for the last couple of years, if not "must see TV." People, you know, laughed at me. Don't discount the drawing power of the always-appealing John Stamos, a key to not only ratings success (look at how "Jake In Progress" burned up the sets!) but also big-time hits, thus his inclusion here.

ER
9 p.m., NBC
This year has been a ratings renaissance for “ER,” with the long-running medical show winning its time slot for the first time in years and the plan to replace it midseason with a new drama scrapped. Tonight Forest Whitaker, currently drawing rave reviews for “The King of Scotland,” guest stars as a stroke patient.

We've also got "Grey's Anatomy," "The Office," "My Name Is Earl," "Ugly Betty" and so on and so forth, read about it here.

Nothing's shocking

2006-10-19T01:18:00.000-07:00

From the ABC DwtS WS (Web site):

In a shocking new twist, no one is sent home. Instead, bottom finishers Jerry Springer and Joey Lawrence get to dance another day! Who will make it to the final four?

That is actually the most unshocking thing they could have done. Let's hope they don't spread this style of marketing to the rest of their programming.

"In a shocking 'Extreme Makeover: Home Edition,' the home being extremely made over is for the family of some sick kid!"

With this Ching I thee Wed

2006-10-19T00:42:00.000-07:00

"30 Rock" - A lot better than the pilot! Rachel Dratch probably shouldn't worry about not getting the main character role because Jane Krakowski doesn't exactly have much to do. The Dakota Fanning bit was funny, as was Tracy ~~Morgan~~ Jordan correcting the writer's grammar. "I'm Bill Cosby sweater Jell-O pudding pop."

"Lost" - I sure would hate it if some punk undercover cop weaseled his way into my pot farm. Wait, there's no punk undercover cops reading this, is there? Golly, I'll never learn my lesson.

"The Nine" - That dude was a lot less annoying as Dr. Phlox. Which is saying something.

"Way" to go

2006-10-18T23:04:00.000-07:00

Jeffrey wins! I totally called it, too, even though I've seen maybe a combined hour this "Project Runway" season and wasn't exactly sure which one I was picking. I knew it was the ratty looking dude that was accused of cheating. Always go with the ratty looking dude accused of cheating, for the record. My mom liked his stuff, so how could I pick against her? Sam will have one of his patented nanosecond-by-nanosecond recaps up real soon.

Channel Surfing for Wednesday, October 18

2006-10-18T16:52:00.000-07:00

As if you need me to tell you that tonight is the "Project Runway" season finale.

But still: Tonight is the "Project Runway" season finale. Sam will have his fastidiously-prepared recap soon after it airs and I'll probably have a little somethin' somethin' too. Here is my hilarious recap/joke:

Project Runway
10 p.m., Bravo
It’s the season finale — honest — and either Laura, Michael, Uli or Jeffrey will walk away with a bounty consisting of $100,000 to start a clothing line, a spread in Elle, a year of agent representation, a design firm mentorship, a 2007 Saturn Sky and, if it clears the final budget, a $10 Red Lobster gift certificate.

It's also the premiere of "Top Chef," the return of Boone to "Lost," the return of Janice Dickinson to "America's Next Top Model," Jane Leeves on "Twenty Good Years" (I know you're psyched, don't lie) and other things as well. Read the rest here.