Bearly believable

Well. Never mind.

These "Heroes" aren't very heroic!

ANOTHER Nancy Grace parody? Come now. When you're ripping off the cutting-edge, biting humor of "Boston Legal," you might be in trouble.

When Christine Lahti was asking Sarah Paulson about the religious-bashing sketches, including "Pat Robertson, Weather Man," why didn't she ask about singing on "The 700 Club"? That's what I immediately thought of. I mean, I don't want to say that I'm a better reporter than Aaron Sorkin's fictional Vanity Fair reporter...but you know,

I strenuously doubt "Search and Destory" would be that popular in this current climate. It's not like "Temptation Island" was even a big hit at all, but people sure seem to think it is now for some reason.

Who exactly thinks that dude's Nicolas Cage is so great we have to see it every week? That sketch doesn't even make sense, because even a bad "SNL" skit would somehow make it reflective of Nicolas Cage's career or personal life, but that's just a guy doing a rather broad Nicolas Cage impression while saying completely normal things. Where's the joke?

Although I am psyched for that United Nations comedy!

To counter all of my making fun of "Studio 60," and to curtail "But why do you even bother watching?" arguments, each week, I'll say something positive about it. Alright. Here goes. Wow. Nervous. Yikes. OK. Ed Asner is good.

Bearly breathing

Well, maybe my prediction was wrong. Maybe.

On an unrelated note, is the expository narration at the beginning of "Heroes" the cheesiest thing in a while or what? THEY HAVE POWERS. THAT PEOPLE DON'T KNOW THEY HAVE. BUT PEOPLE ARE FINDING OUT.

Ripped open cheerleaders? Super gross.

Here's a neat story about Masi Oka's day job.

Superfan roundtable

These people are presenting an accurate assessment of how the Chicago Bears will likely perform against the Arizona Cardinals tonight:



"Ditka will personally sack Matt Leinart." - Noah Austin

Saint misbehavin'

Phew, it was a good thing that the Atlanta Falcons didn't, you know, win - I don't think the American human spirit could have taken the blow.

I had a relatively self-important rant to go here about how little has been done to build up New Orleans over a year since Katrina, and how it's sort of silly and short-sighted to mark a football game as a great triumph with so much not done over there...but that's like, way too serious. Didn't want to give up that great subject title, though.

Maybe in a year's time we can kick off Monday Night Football with Tom Brady and Daunte Culpepper sharing a tasty spanakopita. We must not let the E Coli win.

Making the bandwagon

A friend that recently moved out of town sent me a pretty insightful text message today:

"where did these cardinal fans come from? are they like a clone army or something? created just this year?"

He's indeed correct, it's a surreal experience seeing "our" Arizona Cardinals play a home game on television (and the crowd wasn't just full of Cowboys fans). All of you other cities have been taking such a thing for granted for years!

But why now? Just because there's a fancy, spaceship-esque stadium everyone decides they like the Cardinals who, in case you haven't noticed, have always been quite bad? It's one thing for the games to sell out, I can understand people wanting to check out the new place, but to show fans in the audience who are actually...excited? Bizarro world, big time.

They won, though, so that means that "Cardinals fever!" should last at least another 7 days or so.