Evans: No

Sara Evans has quit "Dancing with the Stars"! At least she went out with a respectable performance. Does this mean Willa Ford gets a reprieve, or will there just not be an elimination next week (unlikely). If the former is the case, can I re-use my "Voters: Escort Ford" subject header?

"It is too bad because dance has a really healing quality to it as well, and I think the family of DWTS could be a great support system for her," Carrie Ann Inaba told Us Weekly.

Wow, she's trying really hard to be nice. Sounds painful.

Here are some of the gory details of Evans' divorce, supposedly the reason she dropped out.

Here is my favorite:

-Evans claims that Schelske keeps more than 100 photos of Schelske "posing with his erect penis"

A victimless crime, right?